Id is Kicking my Butt

I'm in an internal battle between me, myself and I.  Or more specifically - id, ego and superego.

Id:  according to Freud this is the selfish inner part of us that wants what it wants and doesn't care the consequences.

Superego:  this is the part of us that is organized and realistic.

Ego:  the part of us that tries to moralize and balance between the Id and Superego.

So in terms of dieting - the Id wants the food, is willing to indulge, and doesn't care the consequences.  The Superego is that awful critical voice that tells us we look like crap and generally makes us feel horrible about ourselves.  And the Ego is the part that tries to balance the two.

Well, in my world, Id is winning.

My Superego is apparently mute at the moment and my Ego is distracted by other things so my Id is running wild.

Since I am having such trouble, I'm going to have to go drastic for a short period of time.  I'm going back on the lean cuisine plan.  I do really well during the day, so I'll keep on with that - I eat apples, and ham wrapped in lettuce and other rational, low calorie, healthy choices for the most part.  It's dinner and beyond that wreck me.

So, I'll keep doing what I do during the day and then I'll have a lean cuisine at night for dinner.  I will still allow the low sugar snacks (since the doc says I'm to go low sugar, I'm worrying less about fat and more on making sure I have low sugar snacks available).  And I'll pump up the ice water.

Now, I know Id is going to try and balk at this.  It's going to want chocolate deliciousness while watching TV at night.  I just hope that by having no wiggle room in this plan, that I'll bust through and give my Ego a chance to come around, and a small burst of Superego wouldn't hurt, either.

I know this cannot be a long term plan because deprivation leads to an explosion at some point if it is forced for too long.  But maybe I can do this for 1-2 weeks and get myself back on track.

I also added in some more morning exercises this morning - stomach crunches, leg lifts, butt crunches - about 10 minutes worth, which added on top of 60 minutes of bike riding is a good thing.  I want to get back on that bowflex and Total Gym, too, but I'm not going to force myself to do it all or I might fall apart.  Slowly.  I'll do these things gradually.

I also used to set mini goals to keep myself from getting overwhelmed, so I'm going to concentrate on my stomach area.  I want to lose some inches there, so that's my mini goal.

I just hope I can get my Superego and Ego back on track!!