Spring Break Worries

Today is the last day of school before spring break for my little ones.  We will be going out of town for a few days to visit Helen, GA.  I know I'll be eating and drinking more than I should!  But, the place we will be staying has an exercise room and a pool, so I will hopefully exercise more to help balance the eating. 

I am a little worried though.  Even with my planning, it could be dangerous for me!  Especially since I weighed in at 200.6 today - my lowest weight yet!  I'm afraid I'm about to undo everything I've done up to this point.  Now, I know a few days of food and fun won't "undo" me, especially since I know the dangers ahead of time and have some plans to offset any issues (like researching the menus of the restaurants we will eat at, and planning on getting chocolate covered strawberries at the candy shop instead of fudge).  But it's still a scary thing to think the scale might inch back up after it's finally starting to go down again.

But, I will enjoy the time off with my family and if I do de-rail, I will get right back to it as soon as I'm back home. 

And, I amazed myself with my willpower today.  We went into a coffee shop for my hubby to get a cup of coffee (he drinks his black - ewww) and I was able to say "no" to an iced coffee drink - which used to be one of my downfalls!  I am very proud of myself!

In other news, we did get our grill!

I will be grilling some sausages tonight to try it out!  I'm very excited!!

Last night, I made a beef pot pie for dinner that was about 300 calories per serving.  It filled me up, though I think I'll change the recipe a bit.  I'll post it on my recipe page if you are interested! 

Also in other news, I'm at that awful stage where I am in between sizes now.  I got out my summer clothes to wash for the trip and they kind of sag on me.  So I pulled out some of my smaller clothes and they are still too tight.  WTH??  So now I look all frumpy and rumpled which is NOT how I want to show off my weight loss.  Sigh. 

On the bright side (I always try and find a bright side ... it keeps me sane) I am close to going down a size which means a shopping trip for some new outfits!  Maybe that will help me through the next few days when we go on vacation by helping me make some good choices.  I just sure hope I drop the size soon.  I hate this in-between stage.

Well, for now I will frumpishly continue on my journey. 

Grillin' Time!

I made Boca burgers on the grill last night!  I put mushrooms and onions on top with a slice of lower fat Swiss cheese!  Added a little mustard, ate it on a wheat thin bun - tasty!!   Hubby and the kids liked it too!  I made a side of suddenly salad, substituting one of the tablespoons of oil for water and it turned out great!

I was able to cook the onions and the mushrooms without any oils or butter at all.  I used the cooking spray and then added chicken broth a tablespoon at a time as the frying pan got dry.  I put a lid on the frying pan to help "steam" cook the veggies.  Worked pretty well!

I'm so excited about grilling season!  We are hopefully going to buy a new grill this week!  If we do, I'll post a picture!

There is so much you can do with a grill for lower fat cooking!  I'm going to try some foil cooking as well.  That's a great way to have flavor without adding a lot of calories. 

I'm having a great time exploring low calorie foods.  I love to cook and I love to eat.  I had always dreaded a "diet" because I love food so much and the thought of doing without just killed me.  But what I'm finding is that I'm having a blast experimenting with lower calorie recipes.  It's actually fun!  And I'm trying things I never would have deigned to eat before - like the Boca burgers! 

So I'm looking forward to grilling experiments as well.  Nothing like grillin' in the sun with the smells of summer all around.

Now I just need to find some "skinny" alcoholic drinks and I'll be set!!

Determination

This bladder infection is kicking my butt.  I'm still not feeling well.  BUT, I did ride the bike for over an hour today.  And I rode yesterday and did my bowflex strength training, so maybe my determination will kick my infection's butt.

There can't be enough said about determination.  It is the will to keep on going.  We might have motivation.  We might have "reasons" for our journey, but none of that matters unless we have the determination to actually WORK for it. 

Determination keeps us going.  It's the drive for our journey.  Our vehicle.  Without it, all we have are wishes and wanna-be's. 

I've WANTED this for years, but I haven't had the DETERMINATION to do anything about it.  It was a long journey just to get to the point where I got on the bike for the first time.  It's been determination that keeps me there.  Every morning.  Even when I'm tired and don't want to get up, I do.

I'm amazed at how different this journey is from my past "diets."  I honestly believe I can do this forever.  I'm not starving myself, I'm just making better choices.  And I'm finding foods that I can celebrate with and enjoy rather than eating just one type of food or prohibiting any type of food.  Who can live like that? 

I may not be losing the weight quickly like some people, but I am losing it.  Down 11 lbs now.  Still haven't broken that 200 lb barrier, but I'm at 201.  Very close!  And the weight has been coming off for almost 3 months now.  Used to be I'd already have failed my diet and be back up by 10 lbs. 

So, I'll keep fighting this infection and keep going on my journey.

After all, I'm not broken ... I'm a work in progress.



Sickness vs. Willpower

Well, I'm sick.  I've got a bladder infection and feel terrible.  Luckily the doctor was able to fit me in and get me on medicine, but I still feel terrible.

On the one hand I was too sick to eat much all day.  On the other hand, by last night I wanted some kind of comfort food.  I certainly wasn't up to cooking so we ordered out pizza.  And I ate two pieces.  Not a very good choice, but it was a tasty one.  And it made me feel better.

This is another example of how food is emotional for me.  I turn to it whenever I'm down. 

The good news is that I'm feeling a little better today.  The medicine seems to be kicking in.  I slept better as well, so that helps too.

I didn't ride the bike yesterday - was way too sick.  Today I may be able to.  I'm not 100% but I think I may be up to riding for a time.  I was supposed to do the bowflex yesterday as well, so maybe I'll try and do that today, too.  My back is killing me and the doctor said it's from my infection.  And I had forgotten to take my blood pressure medicine yesterday so when I got to the doctor it was 180/110.  NOT good.  So I might actually take today as a day of rest to give my body a chance to heal without stressing it out with exercise.  I'll see how I feel later and go from there.  I will definitely exercise tomorrow if I can't do it today.

So, sickness does a number on my willpower.  I feel like I "deserve" to be pampered when I'm sick and apparently food does the pampering to me.  At least in my mind.  I probably need to come up with an alternative comfort.  Like just going to bed and sleeping rather than turning to food.  I need to try and eat healthy even when I'm sick.  Probably more so than when I'm NOT sick, because my body is trying to heal!  Plus there are some healthy yummy foods out there too ...

This picutre was very funny to me today for some reason. 

At any rate, I'm on the mend and will be back on schedule by tomorrow.  And I haven't gained any weight, so that's a good thing. 

Since sickness is a part of life, I have to have a plan for when it happens.  Then again, a few pieces of pizza when I'm not feeling well isn't the end of my journey to good health.  It's just a speed bump, and I can get back on the proper road once I'm well.  The point is that I need to stay determined and not forget my good habits while I'm sick.

I think I can do that.  I WILL do that.  My willpower is weak during illness, but my determination is stronger than both.

Motivations.

What motivates you?

I am motivated by inspiring quotes and pictures.  I've always loved words.  I live them.  I breathe them.  And now, I've put them up all over my house to inspire me!  And when you tie them to pictures, it's even better!

Here are some that I love:





So, go out there and find your motivation!  Keep up what you are doing and get yourself re-focused and excited about yourself and your actions!

Just do it!

Welcome Spring!

It's the first day of Spring!!  And it's over 80 degrees outside here!  Very strange for us, but welcome all the same.

With the warm weather comes thoughts of bathing suits.  Not a happy thought for me, though I suppose I should be proud that I'm losing the weight even though I'm not comfortable in a bathing suit yet.  I hope that will come! 

I guess we need to go ahead and get the pool ready for swimming.  With the warm weather, I expect we'll be swimming a whole lot earlier this year. 

Also with spring comes gardening!  We are planting lots in our garden this year.  Hubby has been working hard on getting it all ready.  We will plant turnips, green beans, corn, tomatoes, cucumbers and more!  That will help making healthier dinners a lot easier (and easier on the budget too!). 

I'm wearing capris today - white legs and all!  Kind of exciting!  And as I lose weight, I'll be needing new clothes, so I'm looking forward to when I drop some sizes and can go shopping!

BUT, I don't feel like I'm losing any inches these days.  The scale is pretty good, though!  Still haven't broken 200, but I'm thinking it might happen this week!  I still think I should be seeing a lot more changes than I am.  A little bit frustrated, but who can be too upset with weather like today!  And I know it takes time.  I just don't have to like it!

Another fun thing about Spring is grilling out!  It's a great way to cook without having to add in extra oils and such.  I am going to get some boca burgers and see how they taste on the grill!  I love grilled foods and am so looking forward to enjoying lots of it! 

And, speaking of food, tonight I am going to be attempting to make a "light" version of chicken enchiladas.  Not sure it will be any good, but if it is, I'll post the recipe!  I guess it's obvious that I like Mexican food, isn't it?  Keep your fingers crossed on this one!

In other news, my third child has gotten the go-ahead from the knee surgeon to be able to exercise again.  In fact, she will be starting physical therapy on her knee soon.  She wants to start walking with me, which will be another add-in to my exercise, which should help me too! 

I have gone up another 10 lbs on most of my exercises on the bowflex.  I feel good, but I sure do feel like I should have more to show for all this hard work.  Then again, since I'm over 40, I get it.  I know being older causes things to take longer, but it gets so frustrating!  I'm doing all these good things! 

Well, I'll keep doing all that I'm doing.  Maybe I'll be surprised when it comes time for more pictures and measurements to be done.  I sure hope so!

Survived the Weekend.

Well, I made it through the weekend! 

It wasn't the best of choices, but it didn't kill me either!  And I'm raring to go this morning at the start of a new week!  Rode the bike for over an hour, did my reverse crunches, leg lifts and butt crunches this morning!

Have to try and find time to do the bowflex at some point today, which will be difficult given the work schedule today. 

I had gotten down to 201.8 last week (as the lowest of my daily fluctuations) and I'm hoping I might break the 200 barrier this week!  That would be amazing!

So, I'm back on track and very focused and determined this week!

I feel pretty good, even given the date night food and the two college kids being home.  We had a fabulous St. Patrick's Day and I enjoyed some of everything, but didn't go overboard, so I think I came out well!  We even took the kids out to eat on Sunday and I did alright there, too!

I really need to find a way to add something else in to my exercise routine.  It's so gorgeous outside this week that maybe I can find a way to get to the park and walk.  I'll have to really think hard on that this week and take ACTION. 

I am not losing the inches as fast as I would like to.  Some of my friends' blogs show just AMAZING results so much faster than my results are coming along.  Then I remembered that I'm old, so that's probably the reason for it.  Once you hit that 40 mark, EVERYTHING slooooowwwwwssss down. 

So, all I can do is try not to get discouraged and pump up my exercise and see if that helps!

What is changing, though, is my belly.  It is shrinking!  I can actually tell that, even if everything else seems to be going slowly.  I can tell the changes in my waist and feel the muscles that are forming under the fat that is slowly melting away.   I will just keep it up!

I'd like to hear what everyone else does when they feel like their progress is going too slowly.  How do you keep up your determination and spirit?

Part of my determination comes from my sheer stubbornness (I'm sure Hubby will attest to that!)!  So, I'm going to go out there today and be stubborn and successful!

Have a great day!

Weekend Woes?

Here we are at the weekend again!  And it has been a long and exhausting week.  Luckily this weekend has lots of fun (though also, work) planned!

My older kids are coming home from college to celebrate St. Patrick's Day,  hubby and I have date night again tonight - 3 Fridays in a row!! (That rarely happens). 

But therein lies the problem.  We celebrate St. Patrick's Day with FOOD!  We will have corned beef brisket, bubble and squeak, green deviled eggs, shepard's pie, and shamrock sundaes!  I have added in a potato soup and a fruit rainbow this year - both of which are low calorie.  So by planning, I hope I'm able to eat those things and less of the fattening stuff.

And of course, date night, as I've discussed before.  Alcohol and Mexican food.  I think I can handle that though, as well.  I've scoped out the "good" choices and I hope to be able to keep to those this evening, so it might not be bad.

Still, I've done so well this week that the weekend worries me.  There is less structure to the weekend, so I'm open to being blindsided by my monster who loves to creep out and provoke me into savage eating fits. 

I will just enjoy the time with my family and hope that I am strong enough to fight off the beast!

I'm down another pound today!  I've lost 10.2 lbs now!  Not as fast as some other bloggers I've been reading, but still an accomplishment!  I haven't been this weight since December of 2008!  Pretty exciting stuff! 

And I know that a few days of eating less than great choices won't kill me, but I sure hate to go backwards when I've made such progress. 

Weekends are always tough. 

Plus I have to prepare for a big work thing on Monday, so I'll be working as well.  Frustrating, which might lead me to some emotional eating ...

At least I know in advance that there is a potential issue here and I can face it head on and hope I'm strong enough to take it on.  And if I'm not, I'll just exercise a bit more to make up for it and get back on track come Monday!

Priority, Planning and Organization

Priority, Planning and Organization.

Before 1-2-12, I had tried "diets" and trying to "eat better."  But after four kids and a high stress job, it just never happened.  I could never stick with it.  Life got in the way.  Nothing worked.

And I realize now it is because I never gave my health priority.  In fact, I never gave myself ANY type of priority.  It was always about the kids, my hubby, my job, the house, the bills - I came in dead last.

This time is different.  This time, I've made "me" a priority.  Sure, I'm dealing with the guilt over that - who doesn't?  We all tend to put ourselves last in the list of things "to do."  Everyone else is more important.   I think a lot of us have that issue.

My New Year's Resolution wasn't actually to lose weight.  It was more of a "I need to pay more attention to myself" type thing.  My health is not good.  I have high blood pressure and I'm on medication for it.  The doctor tested me for diabetes because of my weight, but luckily I am not diabetic.  Still it was a wake up call.  My youngest is six and I want to be around for her to grow up and have kids of her own.

So I decided 2012 was "me" year.  What this meant is that I MADE myself make time for myself.  My first order of business was to figure out how to add in exercise.  I wasn't ready to tackle the food issue - I love food too much, so I couldn't hit that one right off the bat; it might have cause me to fail right there.  So instead, I  focused on exercise.  But how?  When?  I work full time (plus some!), have four kids, a husband, three dogs and three cats.  How in the world was I supposed to find time?

It wasn't easy.  What it took was planning, organization and prioritizing.  Clearly, I had to take time from somewhere to add in exercise.  So, I took it away from sleep. 

I get up an hour+ early to ride the stationary bike.  Since I planned it in, and since it didn't take time away from my kids, hubby, work, etc, I find I can do it!  And I do do it!  I started on 1-2-12 and I've done it just about every day since.  I ride for 45 minutes to an hour.  And during that time, I read.  Score two for me!  Exercise and pleasure reading at once - two "me" things!

Then I added in weight lifting. This one did require I take some time away from my day. I eat at my desk, so that saves time there. I discovered that I can lift weights right before my daughter's bus comes so I have time to work out and then get down the street to get her off the bus. There was some trial and error in working that in to my schedule, but with planning and organization, I found the best time and I now do it every other day.

More planning came into play in working on the food.  I finally had to tackle that issue.  Losing weight really is important to regaining my health.  So, I now research the meals I plan for calories, fat, etc.  I make a weekly menu and a grocery list from that menu.  I plan in snacks and lunches and breakfasts so that I am able to keep on track as much as possible.  My hubby does the shopping so I am able to take the time to plan the menu.

You can even plan for a future obstacle.  Say you know you are going to have to work late one night.  Plan for it.  Plan for the gang saying, "let's go get a drink" after the meeting is over.  Plan for being starved.  If you think about it, you can come up with something that will work for you.  Maybe eating before the meeting.  Maybe budgeting in the calories for those drinks so you aren't blind sided by it all.

This is why I think it's working this time.  I've lost 10 lbs since 1-2-12.  And I'm still here, still committed, still making "me" a priority.  I still have lingering guilt about focusing on myself, but in the long run, by focusing on me, I'm focusing on my family since it would be hard on them if I died due to health issues.

With planning and organization, we can overcome the obstacles that block us.  Where there is a will, there is a way, and right now, I've got the will!

So, we need to make ourselves a priority.  We need to plan out our exercise and diet.  When we have a plan, there is a better chance we can stick to it.  So face your obstacles and plan a way around them!

You can do it!

Emotional Eating.

Emotional Eating.

I am an emotional eater.  Food makes me feel good when I feel bad.  It makes me joyful when I'm happy.  I celebrate with food. 

And I have to now find a way to deal with this.

The hardest is the need to eat when I feel bad.  There's nothing like a Reece's peanut butter cup when things are awful and I feel down.  So, I have to find some other way to meet that need without resorting to food.  And that's hard.  There are very few things that can be as quick a "pick me up" as a peanut butter cup!  What could possibly substitute for that?

And I really have no answer to that.  Yet. 

I need to investigate what it really is that triggers the need to eat when I'm depressed, stressed or just plain down.  And then figure out something that I can do to appease that need when it is triggered.  Maybe a nice long bath with a nice book would be one way to handle it.  Though that takes a lot more time out of my day then popping a peanut butter cup in my mouth.

Or, maybe it's okay to go ahead and have a peanut butter cup.  Instant pleasure.  And if I only eat one, then that's not a waste of calories.  So I can allow some emotional eating, but I have to be careful.  And let's face it, it's not easy to be careful when you are an emotional/hormonal disaster.

At least I recognize the issue.  That's part of a solution all by itself.

The celebration with food is also hard.  For instance, every Saturday during football season (Go Georgia Bulldogs!)  I make "football food" for everyone.  We all look forward to it, revel in it and just really enjoy it.  Dips, chips, wings, ribs, poppers, you name it, I make it.  It's a happy family time.

This one isn't as hard as the emotional one.  I can make foods that are healthier than the glop I've made in the past.  I can make "lighter" versions of those foods, too.  And I can make less than I used to (I used to make enough for an army).

We also always have a Fiesta on the last day of school.  Another celebration with food.  I can plan better choices there as well.

Maybe that is the key.  With Celebration eating, I have control because I can plan those things (as long as I'm the host).  Planning.  I can overcome the problems by planning through them.

Emotional eating isn't really something you can plan for.  You don't know when you are going to have a bad day in advance.  Maybe diversion is the key there.  There has to be something else I can do to relieve my stress/depression/hormones or whatever it is that sets off a bad day.  Wine is nice, but there you go with the empty calories again. 

There has to be some non-food things that can make me happy.  Like, I like to fly kites.  But it's not like I can do that after a long day at work.  I like to read.  I like to blog.  Actually, that may be the thing for me.  Whenever I have a bad emotional time, I need to get on the computer, visit blogs and blog myself.  Inspiration and strength is but a few keystrokes away.  Plus the computer isn't in the kitchen, so that's a plus!

Any ideas would be welcome.  This will be something I have to contend with for the rest of my life, so it will be nice to hear what other people do to avoid emotional eating. 

The war on fat.

I was just over at Blog to Lose where I often go for inspiration and support.  A girl there was so upset because she has been working hard and the scale just isn't moving.  One of her friends told her it was going to take as long to get off as it did to put on.  Freaked her out.

I reminded her that during that time she didn't work hard and intently on GAINING the weight, but right now she IS working hard on losing it.

What she is experiencing is the mental part of the war on fat.  It's a constant struggle, and it often comes out of nowhere to blindside you when you least expect it.  It causes the self-hate talk to bubble up and over and threatens to dissolve even the most argent of willpowers and intent.

During these times, we need to gather support from our friends, forcefully stop the self-hate talk and move on.  We can get through those moments.  It may not feel like it right then, but we can do it.  I like to go back to my inspiration page and read through the quotes that made me feel good and strong.  I like to read other blogs and feel inspired by what others have done on their journeys.  This isn't going to stop the mental battles we have to wage, but it will help us get through them, to conquer them and to move on in the war.

And some battles we lose.  Sometimes the mental stress causes us to buckle and we fold up like well worn map.  We might binge or splurge or make other not-so-good choices.  But you know what?  That's okay!  It's going to happen!  Get back up tomorrow and get back on track!  One weak moment isn't going to kill you.  In one weak moment, you aren't going to gain back the 10 lbs you lost and all the hard work you've done.  Get back on that horse and charge!

These are the times that we need to think back on what started us on our journey's to begin with.  Re-focus on those reasons.  Remember the excitement you felt when you got underway in this war, the pride, the hope, the determination.  Rekindle that!

If you have taken pictures along the way (as you really should to help SEE what you've accomplished) this is the time to pull those back out and look at those "before" pictures and your current ones.  Look how far you've come!

I like to also look up low calorie meals.  I have to admit, I'm a food junkie, so when I'm feeling frustrated with my progress, I like to find recipes for low calorie comfort food.  Tonight, for example, I'm doing a crock pot roast.  The roast is only 240 calories for 4 oz.  I'm cooking it in beef broth, which only has 15 calories in an entire cup.  It is going to be fall-apart delicious!  I'll make mashed potatoes and use chicken or beef broth in it for flavor and then maybe some green beans.  Talk about comfort food - and low calorie too!  I guess I need to post that recipe on the recipe page as well...

What I'm trying to say is, we are all going to battle ourselves during our war on fat.  Some battles we might not even win, but that's okay.  We WILL win this war. 

When we find ourselves doubting ourselves, switch that point of view to something more constructive.  Okay, so we are upset because the scale has stopped moving.  Let's look back at what we've done over the last week and see if we can find out WHY.  Let's observe our habits, not judge them.  I got that advice from the 52 Weight Loss Missions.  Stop judging.  Start investigating WHY and fix it!

Today was actually a rough day or me this morning.  I didn't have any trouble getting up and on the bike, but I was only on for 10 minutes when I was looking at the clock thinking, "OMG - it's only been 10 minutes???  I'm never going to make 50!!"  It was awful.  I struggled and fought to make 52 minutes this morning.  And then got off and did my reverse crunches and leg lifts and I felt like I was done for the day and needed to go back to bed until tomorrow.

But I dragged myself out of bed, got the kids on the bus (one is home sick with the flu, however ... I can't wait for that one to hit me) and made it to work.  I was still all down until I went to the Blog to Lose site and started reading and commenting ... then I felt better. 

So, get out there and fight your battles!  You can do it!  Use the tools at your disposal!  Tomorrow is another day!

More food ideas.

Ok, so dinner last night was another fantastic low calorie meal out of the Taste of Home Comfort Food Diet cookbook!  Really tasty and only 244 calories for a whopping cup and 1/3!  I'll post the recipe on my recipe page.

And I also got looking at other low calorie things!  I found that Old El Paso foods aren't too bad - even though they are Mexican food!



That's pretty amazing - 80 calories for 1/3 cup.  You add that to a tortilla (which can range in calories from 52 for a corn tortilla to 159 for a large flour tortilla) then that's a pretty hearty low cal meal right there!  And you can add chopped tomotoes, peppers etc which won't add much in the way of calories but adds a lot of flavor and texture.

So, really, there are lots of choices for us out there if we are counting calories.  We just have to do the research and find them.  Or I can do the research and post them here for you!

Yesterday was a lot better day for me with my choices.  I did well during the day and then ate the yummy dinner that was only 244 calories - and that was a whole meal!  A fully satisfying meal for 244 calories.  Unbelievable.

Tonight I'm making my ham and bean soup since work is going to be crazy.  So I'll have my 118.5 calorie dinner tonight (though I bet I will eat more than 1 cup - which is okay - even 2 cups is only 237 calories!).  So maybe this week will be a great week!

I will keep you posted!

Fad Diets.

You know, I've been wondering if maybe I SHOULD do a fad diet to jump start the weight loss.  It's just going sooooo slowly (and I've actually gained a bit back due to my lack of good choices over the weekend).  I just wonder if maybe I do one of those "fads" for a week or so, if that really would jump start me, or if it would just work until I went off of it and then I'd gain it all back.

I suppose if I want to do something to get fast results, I could always just restrict the calories for a short time.  But with the exercising I do, I get all shaky when I don't eat enough. 

One of the new apps I downloaded is called the Rapid Weight Loss Diet.  It seems very restrictive - no fruits, no veggies ... how can this be a good thing?  It seems to kind of go along the lines of the Atkins diet - lots of protein, no carbs.  Not so sure about this one.  However, there are some really good things in this app as well - the exercise ideas are quite interesting.  It talks about planking which I have already been doing at my daughter's suggestion.  I can tell you, from the pain in my stomach muscles, it does something!

I think if I had to pinpoint the theme of my diet, it would be calories, calories, calories.  Rather than going on some weird diet where all you eat is grapefruit or something, it seems to me that calories are the key to weight loss.  I even heard about a guy who ate nothing but twinkies and lost weight because he kept the calorie intake low.  The point of his experiment was to prove that it doesn't matter what you eat as long as you count those calories.

So, I've added in a lot more vegetables since they are lower in calories and I can eat more of them and feel full.  Plus, I like a lot of different veggies.  I really like green beans and broccoli (though the gas factor of broccoli leaves a bit to be desired). 

And it seems to be working.  But veeerrrryyyy slowly.  I want to lose it faster!!

Then again, when people lose weight too quickly, there is all that extra saggy skin to deal with.  So maybe doing it as I am is the way to go.

It's just so frustrating.  I want results! 

How quickly I've already forgotten that I lost 6" in one month.  I guess I just want the numbers on the scale to follow suit.

So, maybe I should do some kind of fad diet for a few days or a week and get some quick results and then go back to the calorie counting.  I guess I'll think about it for a bit.  If I find something that strikes me, maybe I'll try it.  If I do, I'll report back!

Date Night Success!

I am pleased to report that I did a LOT better last night than I did last Friday night!  I did a little research, and though I didn't make the best choices I could, I still made BETTER choices than I did before. 

I chose the fried shrimp which were about 27 calories each.  I ate ten of them, so that was 270 calories.  I only ate about 10-12 of the fries that came on the plate (I was very worried that I wasn't going to be able to control myself there - I DO love fries!).  I ate a few bites of the fried fish.  However, I did eat the tartar sauce.  That was something I forgot about during my research phase so I don't know how many calories that did me in for.  But we did not get the guacamole dip, which saved us a lot of unneeded calories.  I did still eat some chips and salsa.  The salsa isn't bad, but the chips are so, I tried to limit the number.  I didn't eat too many.  I broke them up so it felt like I was eating a lot more.  All in all, I'd say it was a success!

And, I'll go ahead and ride the bike today even though I usually take the weekends off to let my body recuperate from the week.  I think I'll feel better if I go ahead and ride today.

So, I'm pleased to report that date nights CAN be manageable.  I mean, I could have had the grilled chicken thing, but it sounded so unappetizing.  I refuse to feel deprived when I'm out on a date with my hubby.

I'm in a much better place today than I have been in a while.  The mental health aspect of a date night is so important.  I feel stronger today.  More focused.  Driven.  Optimistic. 

I'm making soft boiled eggs for breakfast and I've taken my vitamins, so things are going well today.

I am going to try some more "light" meals this coming week.  I am very excited about that given the success of that tomato soup!  I will post successful, tasty recipes on my recipe page!  I will also probably make another batch of the bean and ham soup.  It's so comforting and at only 118.5 calories a cup, it's hard to pass that up.  I just don't want to make so much of it that I get sick of it. 

Soups can be a great diet food.  Especially in the winter when it's cold outside.  A thick, hearty soup can really feel decadent when in reality, it's not high in calories.  My downfall with soups is that I always want to eat a big, thick piece of bread slathered with butter on it with the soup ... not so good for you! 

I also downloaded some more apps for my ipad that are supposed to be weight loss helpers.  I will try them out and report back to you!

Did I tell you that I made my first goal of this diet/journey?  I had set a non-weight related goal as advised in the 52 Weight Loss Missions app (since constantly harping on the numbers on the scale is often a very bad thing).  I wanted to lose 2" off my waist.  And I did!  In one month, I've shed 2"!!  Very exciting.  I know I reported my inches lost, but I don't think I said how within those inches I actually met my first goal!  Now, I've set another one.  I want to lose 2 MORE inches off my waist!

There is one downside.  I'm starting to have my clothes fit looser and look saggy on me.  But I haven't lost enough to actually go down a size yet.  So I'm in that frumpy looking stage.  Kind of distressing, actually.  BUT, I have to remember, that I'm progressing, and soon I WILL be able to go down a size and go shopping for some clothes!

I will keep you guys posted!  

Sabotage.

There are so many things that are just waiting to jump out and sabotage us on our journeys to healthier selves.  I'm amazed, really, at the number of them.  They seem to lurk around every corner, in every closet, and sometimes blatantly smack you upside the head when you are looking straight at them!

This week I have battled several attempts at sabotage.  I've had my beast rearing it's head at me, tempting me with thoughts of decadent food, trying to eat away my willpower. 

I've also faced that lovely demon that seems to come up so often in the journey for
health - time.  It has been an incredibly busy week.  Deadlines looming, too many things to do and not enough time to do them. 

Time really is one of the biggest saboteurs there is.  First, we have to deal with the time issue to even begin our journeys.  We have to make the time to fit exercise into our lives.  We have to make the time to do grocery lists and menus to accompany our new lifestyle.  Which, of course, means taking time from somewhere else.  Second, time has a way of shrinking when we least expect it.  This week, my time for work expanded beyond my expectations, which made the time I had for other things shrink accordingly.  Sometimes it almost seems that time is the evil villain in a story out to make my life miserable just for the fun of it.  Who knew that time was sentient?

So this week, I've ended up not having the time to work out on the bowflex but one day.  I managed it Monday, but had work issues on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.  I WILL do it today. 

The time saboteur also created other problems.  Not only did I not have time to work out like I wanted to (other than riding the bike - I did that every morning, but that's only because I fit it in before my day starts), but I also didn't have the time to do a proper menu for the week or corresponding grocery list.  That made for some bad options when it came to food.  Because I was too tired and working such long hours, I ended up making unhealthy food choices, simply because they were easy, fast, and, I have to admit, yummy.  (I think part of that sabotage was my beast again - or maybe just emotions - and time is not ALL to blame for that). 

And, tonight, another saboteur - Date Night.  Which I have already discussed before.  I can plan to make better choices tonight than I did last Friday.  But there will still be plenty of calories.  And alcohol - which makes making good choices that much harder!  But, as I said before, there are the obvious benefits to date night which overcome the caloric issues.

The bottom line is to be on the lookout for sabotage.  It can be faced. It can be met.  It can be defeated.  And if not, then pick yourself back up again and start again tomorrow.

Measurement Day.

Well, one month ago, I did my first measurements.  So, today, I did another set.  I was sure that I haven't lost any inches and when I did the pictures to compare to a month ago, I don't see much change there either, so I was expecting to be disappointed with the inches.

However ... ::drum roll, please::  I have lost 6"!  Of course, that's from all over, but still, I'm quite excited about it!  I've lost 2" off my waist!  So I am pleased!

Yesterday wasn't as bad as the day before and today feels pretty good.  I rode the bike for over an hour and it wasn't a horrible struggle to make myself do it.  I actually was looking forward to it.  So I guess the trouble I was having was just a phase and I've gotten through it.  This time.  I'm sure I'll be back here for help and inspiration the next time.

I think it is very important to constantly remind ourselves why we are on our journeys.  I mean our deep-down reasons.  Not the "I want to wear that pretty dress" reason, but the "I don't want to die from health related illnesses" reasons.  And really, the pictures help too.  The kids think it's funny that I've posted them everywhere, but you know, if it works, keep on doing it!  I like the idea of cycling through them so that I don't get bored with them.

I have to keep motivating myself.  This blog certainly helps.




I think this last week has reminded me that this is not an easy journey.  There are going to be days where I can barely make myself move, much less do the weight lifing.  And then there are going to be days when I feel really good, like today!

You can always bribe yourself to get through the bad days.  I was thinking that I need to get some weight lifting gloves (I had forgotten how badly your hands hurt when you lift weights!) and I think that might be an excuse on a bad day to pamper myself and buy some!  And maybe some cute exercise clothes too!  Okay, so that's probably a woman thing, but guys can bribe (or reward?) themselves too - we just have to remember not to reward ourselves with FOOD. 

At any rate, today is a great day. I am doing it another day ... one day at a time!

I've hit a rough spot.

I don't know why I'm having so much trouble right now.  I want to eat and I want to eat a LOT.  I don't know what's wrong with me.  I want bad-for-me stuff.  Like red velvet cake.  And Long John Silver's fish and chicken.  I'm having a very hard time! 

I know that it's been bad at work for the past week or so - I've worked non-stop, so I'm sure stress is part of it.  Maybe this is a comfort thing.  I'm so stressed out and tired from work that I want food because it makes me feel good.

On the good end of things, my muscles are all achy from my workout yesterday, so I know I'm doing something on my exercise end of things.  The bike riding is pretty much second nature now, so that's also a good thing.  It's just so hard to do those things.  I just don't want to.  A few weeks ago I was all excited about the bike riding and the weight lifting, but the past few days have just been really hard.  I don't feel like working out or exercising.  I'm just so tired!

Of course, I haven't slept well, as usual.  My littlest one is sick, so that makes it hard.  The one night the dogs slept through the night, I ended up with my little on in our room at 3 a.m.  I don't think I ever did get back to sleep after that.  I was working by 7 a.m., after having worked until after 8 pm last night, I'm just so tired.

I hope this is a phase.  I hope that I work through this and go back on an upswing.  I'm thinking that maybe as the weather gets warmer, I'll get a "spring fever" type burst of energy and enthusiasm. 

Meanwhile, I'll keep trying to keep on going.  I've gained back a few pounds with the date night extravaganza and then I ate out on the following night and then ate out lunch yesterday.  It's not a big weight gain - about a pound - so I'm hoping if I can make better choices I'll start losing again.  I'm just having a heck of a time making the right choices right now.

So, I think what I'll do is refocus on what started me on this journey and see if I can re-motivate myself.  Maybe if I cut out a new batch of inspiring pictures to put up around the house that will help. 

I haven't had a chance to make the grocery list for this week yet (which leads again to bad choices) but I've been so busy I just haven't had time.  I will try and do that and maybe I can start making better choices and get myself back on track again.

I'm supposed to measure myself on the 8th and I'm a little afraid to ... I'm just not seeing big results.

As one of my kids said, "I want to lose weight a lot faster than you are."  She's put on some weight due to a knee injury and is looking forward to exercising again and losing some weight.  But apparently she doesn't want to lose it as slowly as I am.  And I have to agree with her.  This is taking forever. 

But I have to remember this is for the long haul.  I don't want to do a fad crash diet, which might work for two weeks but then end up binging on a horrible scale.  I want to do this right.  By trying to eat healthier and to exercise more.  And it's not a quick fix. 

I just have to keep on telling myself that I can do this.  I hope it gets better soon!

Date night.

Well, originally, I had thought I would come up with a plan to deal with date night.  I didn't.  I just sat down this morning (after a wonderful date night) to add up what the calories of what I ate were.  Whew.  Mexican food is really outrageous!  I SHOULD have done this before I went out, but it was a really busy, long week and all I really wanted to do was go out and enjoy some time with my hubby.  Which I did.

However, now that I have looked up all the things I ate last night (I believe I overate the amount of calories I was allowed by about 2000 or so ...) I realize, it really is important to know what you are going into before you get there.  If I knew last night what I know this morning, I would have chosen a lot differently as to what I ate.

For instance, it is the chips that killed me last night.  I love the guacamole dip and chips.  But if I had known that 50 chips are 730 calories, 35 grams of fat and 630 sodium, I think I would have chosen NOT to eat those.  When you add in a cup of the guacamole (we got the large, and I ate most of it - I'd say at least a cup worth) which is 364 calories, 33.3 grams of fat and 344 sodium, then you are talking some major calories/fat just in the appetizer! 

We also ordered chicken wings, which turns out was a really good option.  Six wings is 270 calories, 18 grams of fat (though still a whopping 1308 mg of sodium) plus offers up 18 g of protein.  I also love mushroom quesadillas - 492.2 calories, 27.1 grams of fat, 610.9 sodium and 20.3 g of protein.

Then, of course, add in my cosmopolitan drinks and I just really went over the top.

So, knowing all this now, I will forgo the dip next time.  The wings are fantastic and a fairly smart choice.  Or maybe I'll do just the mushroom quesadilla. 

I'm not giving up my cosmopolitans though!   
                                                                         

So, the lesson I've learned is that when I know in advance I'm going to go out somewhere, even if I don't want to deprive myself, I can do some research and come up with the best alternatives.  I may still eat over the amount I should, but I won't be blown away by unforeseen, unexpected calories. 

On the other hand, I have been fairly good in my regimen for two months, so one night of revelry isn't going to kill me.  I'm back on track today and I really enjoyed the date and that makes me mentally healthy.

On this journey I am looking to get totally healthy and that means body and mind.  So I'm not going to worry about the calories I ate last night. I have learned something from it and will be better prepared next time.  So, now, I will just continue on my journey in the direction of my healthy self.

"Lighter"  food.

Holy cow, the dinner last night was fantastic.  I really, really recommend this cookbook for anyone on a "diet" or just wanting to eat healthier.  It is Taste of Home's Comfort Food Diet Cookbook.  Truly wonderful!

I made a few changes to their recipe, but really loved it.  I'll post what I did on the recipe page.

The only problem that I had was that it was so good, I couldn't just eat one helping.  I ended up eating 2 1/2 times the "serving" amount!  But, boy was it good.  I guess I needed some comfort food, because I feel so much better today than I have for the past two days!  (It probably didn't hurt that I had some wine as well!).

I don't know what was wrong with me the past few days.  I was just a little glum.  I don't feel like I was deprived or anything, but maybe I was.  A glass of wine and some rich soup did wonders to bring me back to myself.  And even with that I still kept it under 1400 calories! 

It probably also doesn't hurt that I am going to get my haircut today.  I think a little pampering goes a long way.  I've always felt guilty for spending money on things like hair cuts or clothes when I look so awful and overweight.  I mean, who wants to spend money on hair, when you don't feel like anything will make you look better anyway?  That's just an example of how our "self hate" talk can really be a bad thing. 

So, I'm embracing my hair cut today.  It's kind of a reward for working so hard on my health since January 2nd.  It will be two months that I've kept this up tomorrow!  I'm pretty proud of that fact!

Wow.  Two months.  I'm impressed with myself!  I don't know that I've ever made it two months on a "diet" before.  Of course, I'm not on a "diet" now - I'm just on a journey go get healthier!

   I'm so happy that I've been able to keep it up.  This blog helps, for sure.  And I have friends who are supportive.  And even though my family grumbles every time I say I'm going to try a new low calorie meal, they jump in there and try it with me - and are often pleasantly surprised! 

Here is an inspiring quote:

          "The Greatest Thing In The World Is Not So Much Where We Are,
            But In What Direction We Are Moving" - Oliver Wendell Holmes

I think I'm moving pretty well at the moment.  And, so, I'll keep going in the direction I'm moving!